skim milk

I actualy like skim milk, but today I tried making my own. I filed the glass half way up with water and the other half milk. that"s how they make it right? the first half was fine but once I got to the water it was gross! today I learned that some things are meant to be paid for. you learn  something new every day!

lobsters are evil...

   as far as I know, lobsters are the foulest, evilest, meanest, most horrible things in the world. and here is a list of why they will take over the world:

1: they pinch people

2:if you put them in boiling water tail first, they splash it on you.

3:there antennas are realy swords.

4: they tried to pinch my nose off...

                                                         

cookies!

the other day we had realy big cookies, and I mean big! I tried to put the whole thing in my mouth at once, just to be funny. there was only a little bit sticking out, and it got stuck. I could still breath, so here I am walking around with a cookie shoved in to my mouth and I cant talk. at one point I inhaled some and I couldn't breathe. I had to take it out and slobber got evrywhere. ewwwwwwwww...

Today I tryed...

today I tried drinking penut butter from a straw... it was stupid and messy. I didn't even get any and it got stuck! then I had to throw my straw out because I couldn't get the penut butter out! what a waste of a perfectly good straw... I'm suing craft...

pancakes

this may be hard to read, but on a 63 inch computer, its fine!

so anyway lets get to the point. I just realized that if you eat 6 pancakes very, very fast you feel sick. for todays random joke, this is what iv'e got.

a girl was walking by a fire station with a red wagon. she had tied a rope from the handle to her dogs collar and anouther to her cats testicles. a fire fighter walks up and says "thats a nice fire truck you've got there, but I think it would go faster if you tied it to the cats collar? then the girl replys "yes, but then I wouldn't have a siren."

Iv'e always wondered...

iv'e always wondered: in the first pirates of the Caribbean, how does the black pearl go so fast if it has holes in the sales?

how does it go under water?


and why do they have food on the ship if they can't eat?

MY FIRST 1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I started this blog because i'm super funny (and random) but theirs only so many people that know me and that I can share it with. so if you like random idiocy, this is the perfect place for you. so i'm gonna start off with some random keys. how it works is I turn away from the computer and type randomly. kuyglujk[0up98y'pkp]-07p09u'ppjp079t6p98yu0986r9imjfjhtfuytfoyfgluyrhgfuwtd76365354yteyut576nv cfdsgur      

  

funny how only some of that says that its a spelling error... but it would be pretty weird if it had 1 big red line...  this was my first blog. come back for more and note that it will only get more crazy.